Escape from Calcutta
	ESCAPE FROM CALCUTTA Submit a Tale here | More Tales To review the last episode, they were at their wits end trying to keep all their marbles together in the world renowned city: CALCUTTA!! We successfully managed to survive getting to the airport. We had to go through the predictable "mumble jumble" of Indian Customs which consisted of having (no kidding) 5 different people go through our bags and being sent to 3 different lines with different tags etc...AAAHHHH!!! FINALLY! We were on the plane to go to Bangkok, and what a relief that was!! No more people staring, beggars begging, horns honking, noise/craziness/shit everywhere/garbage everywhere, etc...Instead it was "civilization" in the 21 century, technological, western way!! In Bangkok we had to do the typical tourist thing and visit the "Red Light District". So the two of us went with other Italian /Australian/Dutch/South African guys. We all managed to stuff ourselves into a "Toot Toot", a little three wheeled carriage which resembles a golf cart and normally only fits three people. (Yes, we are trying to save money.) Apart from almost tipping over every time the driver turned corners AND the driver "accidentally" touching my breast with his elbow whenever he had the chance (I should have slugged him one but I knew he had our life in his hands), we all arrived safely at the "Red Light District". The second we got there the girls were all over Cees and the rest of the guys. It was funny to watch. They all dragged us up to a "Show". There were about 10 naked girls on stage with EXTREEMLY BORED looks on their faces while AT THE SAME TIME they were doing ingenious acts with their "female genitalia" - blowing out candles on a cake, shooting pin pong balls into the audience, sucking up water from one bottle then pouring out (what looked like) coke into another, etc, etc. You really had to see it to believe it. We managed to escape without the guys being manipulated into getting massages or any other things that would have resulted in a big bill upon leaving. Oh and not to mention that some of the "ladies" were actually what they call "lady boys" - transvestites which are way sexier than the real girls. Eager to get out of the big city we left the next night on a 14hr B.B.B.R (butt burning bus Ride) heading down to the islands. We managed to make it to Koh Phangan Island just in time for one of their famous "Full Moon Parties" which consists of about 5,000 people on a beach with all night music and dancing, fireworks etc. What made this party all the more special was that it coincided with...the Lunar Eclipse AND my 32nd Birthday!! The whole night was a great party and since then we have just been sunbathing under blue skies on sandy white beaches all day, snorkelling in a crystal clear, turquoise ocean with multi coloured fish, sleeping in hammocks … (have I made you jealous yet?). It has really made me reconsider why I have (out of my own free will!) chosen to live in such a miserably cloudy, grey, rainy place (90% of the year) such as Holland. Ideas of relocating are definitely going thru my mind!!